House Of Alexzander
That scruffy stuff on my face.

Ah yes, my facial hair.
I can still remember the horror of having multiple whiskers protrude from my face just a few days after turning fifteen.
I wanted it gone forever, immediately!
I took pride in my smooth soft skin, I had worked very hard through puberty to make sure I never had one pimple.
Not. Even. One.

But biology said fuck your smooth skin!
Deal with it.

So, I have been and the conclusion is probably not what you think.
I’ve tried waxing, shaving, trimming and so on.
On one particular occasion I became so upset with my facial hair that I quite literally plucked every hair from the left side of my face. The only reason I stopped before reaching the right side (besides that awful pain) was because I noticed that the left side where I had been plucking was now starting to swell and go numb. The next day, the left side of my face was red and slightly purple. It appeared as if someone had repeatedly back handed the left side of my face. 

So my conclusion?
We’ll, I’ve accepted it.
I had to ask myself a serious questions that left me heart broken and humiliated…
Why do I hate my facial hair?
After beating myself over the head with this question I found my answer with a good friend of mine who has struggled with weight gain for a few years.

A while back we were ridding home from the city, her kids were asleep in the back and we began talking about life.
In the middle of the conversation she says 
“Alex, would you think of me different if I just gave up on trying to loose all this excessive body weight from having the kids?”
I thought a moment, I mean really thought about what to say and if I would see her opinions or judgments differently. Then I asked her a question.
“Would you think of me different if I stopped fighting with this stupid hair growing out of my face and still wore clothing that the rest of society deemed as feminine?

Together both of us pondered while listening to some music, still on the highway.

Finally, she spoke up and said “you know what, yes! I would see you differently! I would see you, giving a big damn fuck you to society for making you feel as if you aren’t pretty enough to wear a dress or high heels simply because your biology insists on pushing hair out of your face, something you have NO CONTROL OF. You don’t get to choose your body type, you just have to accept it, and if you did that, I think it would be inspirational!”

At this point I’m in tears, because she’s right!
So I pull over because I can’t see when I’m crying and she takes over driving.

Back on the road, I said “You know, you’re so right! The only reason I want my facial hair gone is because I want other people to think I’m pretty and that I should belong in a dress or high heels. Facial hair has made me feel that I don’t belong in some of the clothes I wear, but really its not my facial hair, its this idea pressured onto me by todays societal standard that I can’t have both. Its the same thing for you to though! You have been kicking your own ass over the weight you gained after the kids. But why? Because your afraid that others will see you as a bad example for your kids, or that you are lazy! But the truth is, being a single mother with two toddlers is all you can handle right now. You deserve to feel beautiful because you are beautiful! Your weight is a testament to the struggle that you have went through to bring two lives into this world, it should not be seen as a problem! But just like my facial hair, I’ve grown up in a society where its taboo to be scruffy & fabulous! But you know, these are our bodies, this is what they do, this is how they react to our genetic make up, this is how they respond to LIFE! Why should we hate that?”

At this point, she’s in tears now, the kids are waking up, its getting hard for her to see the road too. She pulls off some random exit and I tell her to pull into the first place that serves ice cream. 
Got the kids settled momentarily, got the ice cream and then talked a bit more.

At the end of the conversation, we had come to the conclusion that the only reason we see the things we don’t like about ourselves as a problem, is because we are comparing ourselves to a beauty standard that is unattainable for ourselves. Ultimately , fighting a battle that has already been lost. 

Some people might not like my facial hair, which is fine.
But I have accepted it and I will embrace it.
Deal with it.

-Elliott Alexzander High-res

That scruffy stuff on my face.

Ah yes, my facial hair.
I can still remember the horror of having multiple whiskers protrude from my face just a few days after turning fifteen.
I wanted it gone forever, immediately!
I took pride in my smooth soft skin, I had worked very hard through puberty to make sure I never had one pimple.
Not. Even. One.

But biology said fuck your smooth skin!
Deal with it.

So, I have been and the conclusion is probably not what you think.
I’ve tried waxing, shaving, trimming and so on.
On one particular occasion I became so upset with my facial hair that I quite literally plucked every hair from the left side of my face. The only reason I stopped before reaching the right side (besides that awful pain) was because I noticed that the left side where I had been plucking was now starting to swell and go numb. The next day, the left side of my face was red and slightly purple. It appeared as if someone had repeatedly back handed the left side of my face.

So my conclusion?
We’ll, I’ve accepted it.
I had to ask myself a serious questions that left me heart broken and humiliated…
Why do I hate my facial hair?
After beating myself over the head with this question I found my answer with a good friend of mine who has struggled with weight gain for a few years.

A while back we were ridding home from the city, her kids were asleep in the back and we began talking about life.
In the middle of the conversation she says
“Alex, would you think of me different if I just gave up on trying to loose all this excessive body weight from having the kids?”
I thought a moment, I mean really thought about what to say and if I would see her opinions or judgments differently. Then I asked her a question.
“Would you think of me different if I stopped fighting with this stupid hair growing out of my face and still wore clothing that the rest of society deemed as feminine?

Together both of us pondered while listening to some music, still on the highway.

Finally, she spoke up and said “you know what, yes! I would see you differently! I would see you, giving a big damn fuck you to society for making you feel as if you aren’t pretty enough to wear a dress or high heels simply because your biology insists on pushing hair out of your face, something you have NO CONTROL OF. You don’t get to choose your body type, you just have to accept it, and if you did that, I think it would be inspirational!”

At this point I’m in tears, because she’s right!
So I pull over because I can’t see when I’m crying and she takes over driving.

Back on the road, I said “You know, you’re so right! The only reason I want my facial hair gone is because I want other people to think I’m pretty and that I should belong in a dress or high heels. Facial hair has made me feel that I don’t belong in some of the clothes I wear, but really its not my facial hair, its this idea pressured onto me by todays societal standard that I can’t have both. Its the same thing for you to though! You have been kicking your own ass over the weight you gained after the kids. But why? Because your afraid that others will see you as a bad example for your kids, or that you are lazy! But the truth is, being a single mother with two toddlers is all you can handle right now. You deserve to feel beautiful because you are beautiful! Your weight is a testament to the struggle that you have went through to bring two lives into this world, it should not be seen as a problem! But just like my facial hair, I’ve grown up in a society where its taboo to be scruffy & fabulous! But you know, these are our bodies, this is what they do, this is how they react to our genetic make up, this is how they respond to LIFE! Why should we hate that?”

At this point, she’s in tears now, the kids are waking up, its getting hard for her to see the road too. She pulls off some random exit and I tell her to pull into the first place that serves ice cream.
Got the kids settled momentarily, got the ice cream and then talked a bit more.

At the end of the conversation, we had come to the conclusion that the only reason we see the things we don’t like about ourselves as a problem, is because we are comparing ourselves to a beauty standard that is unattainable for ourselves. Ultimately , fighting a battle that has already been lost.

Some people might not like my facial hair, which is fine.
But I have accepted it and I will embrace it.
Deal with it.

-Elliott Alexzander

OMG, SHOES!

As a gender variant fashion blogger, it can be really difficult to find great shoes. I wear a size US 11 and I can not find a pair of heels that fit, unless I am buying online. So in response to the thousands of questions I have received about my shoes, I give you this! A list of places where you can buy cute shoes in sizes US 11 or higher! Each with an average price range, highest size available & a tid bit of info on the brand. NONE of these links are affiliated, AT ALL. I simply want to make finding great shoes a little bit easier for people who need a higher shoe size. I highly encourage anyone that may know of any other places to get great shoes in a higher size, to reblogg this and add your own recommendations. I personally will be following this post to see what others have to suggest so that I can update the original post regularly. Also, below is a basic shoe size conversion chart.
Xoxo
-Elliott Alexzander


CHARLOTTE RUSSE - $30-$60 Highest size is 11 but the selection is good. Plus, every Tuesday they have a shoe sale, online only.

TRAFFIC SHOES - $20-$50 Highest size is 11 and the selection is low! You really have to search, but you might find something perfect at a perfect price!

ALDO $50-$120 Highest size is 11 with a fair selection, however nothing to exciting. Great quality.

US TRENDY - $30-$150 Highest size is 12 with a HUGE and kind of random selection. Not sure how reliable they are about getting sizes back in stock, but they seemed to be out of a lot!

PAYLESS SHOES - $30-$80 Highest size is 13 with a really nice selection actually. Plus, the website is really easy to maneuver with options for wide or narrow feet. As far as finding a pair of shoes that are really unique, you might get lucky, but for the most part they offer basic styles.

Long Tall Sally -$100-$300 Highest size is 15!!! The prices are real high, but at least the offer sizes past 13. The styles vary so you’ll really need to look to find something good.

TORRID $25-$85 Highest size is 13 with a cool selection. The prices are slightly on the higher side but I think its worth it for the designs they offer. Also, just so you know, they make you sign up for an account before shopping but its not to time consuming. Plus, you can go ahead and put your sizes in so that only things in your size appear when shopping.

6PM SHOES $20-$90 Highest heel size is 16! Highest shoe size is 18!!! Not to mention, the selection is INSANE! There are a ton of shoes to look through but the website gives you tons of options to narrow your search!

DSW SHOES $30-$80 Highest size 13-14 depending on the style you’re looking for. If you are looking for that WOW pair of heels, you might actually find it here. You’ll have to search through the bland stuff but there are some stellar finds here and there.

I’ve added a simple shoe size conversion chart for anyone that needs it.

Lips.

I sure have missed posting on here.
Things got a little crazy here on my side of the planet.
What I’m trying to say is I’ve missed you!

As promised I’ve been working on a few updates for House of Alexzander. I’ll be publishing the first tonight so stay tuned!

I hope all is well with each and everyone of you out there and may good vibes be sent to those of you who need them. I’m really excited to begin posting regularly again now that I am settled in to my new place! 

Xoxo

-Elliott Alexzander High-res

Lips.

I sure have missed posting on here.
Things got a little crazy here on my side of the planet.
What I’m trying to say is I’ve missed you!

As promised I’ve been working on a few updates for House of Alexzander. I’ll be publishing the first tonight so stay tuned!

I hope all is well with each and everyone of you out there and may good vibes be sent to those of you who need them. I’m really excited to begin posting regularly again now that I am settled in to my new place!

Xoxo

-Elliott Alexzander

Light to Dark.

Autumn is fast approaching which means its time for a transformation!
For as long as I can remember, I have changed with the seasons.
Not necessarily just my wardrobe but my emotions are a bit different as well. I am particularly excited about this Fall season because I feel that I have grown tremendously since last year.

This photo set begins with my last few outfits of the summer, then leads you into just a little taste of what my followers can expect to see this Fall/Winter season. I want to use deep hair, lip & nail colors to accent a dark and mysterious wardrobe. Focusing on cosmetics & shoes, my goal is to address the issues gender variant individuals might face this season when buying clothes and cosmetics tailored for a binary gendered society.
A few topics include facial hair & how I maintain it for make up application, as well as how AFAB can grow facial hair without taking hormones! A shoe guide that connects you with affordable brands that offer trendy shoe styles in sizes 11 & higher! Last but not least, I will begin making the lip colors & nail colors I wear in my fashion post available to you via my Thrift Store! A few other things will take place this fall, but you’ll have to stay tuned to find out!
Along with elevating my style, I also am striving to elevate the presence of House of Alexzander. I’m excited and anticipating a great Season ahead!

Much love,
Xoxo
-Elliott Alexzander

Here is a whole mess of THROW BACK for you!
I’ve been moving and I found two flash drives with all these pictures!

This was me at the very beginning stages of my transformation.
I had just learned about gender variance and was trying to embrace my gender fluidity by wearing different clothes (Leggings, feminine tops, ect.)
However, I still had not broken free from the masculine shell society had boxed me in.

By the way, all these outfits were shot behind my house, where NO ONE could see me. I was still not confident enough to leave the house in something like what I’m wearing above!

This photo set is just proof that things take time! If you’re struggling with gender identity, I understand the fear & anxiety you’re going through because I have been there myself and these photos are proof. Proof of a time when I was still scared of being non-binary & fearful of what my friends and family would say and if they could accept me.

Keep your head up & push forward!
You are special and most importantly,
YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

Xoxo

-Elliott Alexzander

My favorite #Prince album cover.

"I’m not a woman. I’m not a man. I am something that you’ll never understand." - Prince High-res

My favorite #Prince album cover.

"I’m not a woman. I’m not a man. I am something that you’ll never understand." - Prince